“I quit!” Is something I have rarely, if ever, said. It implies to me a person has reached a stage of desperation, has thrown their hands up and in a fit of anger or despair has simply ‘walked out’ of a situation, relationship, or job. Invariably ‘quitting’ has a negative connotation. We are supposed to pull up our boot laces and carry on carrying on. But perhaps that is an outdated modus operandi. Although I would not say I was a ‘quitter’ I have certainly made decisions to change direction.
Changing direction implies that I knew what direction I was headed in. Then after considering the eventual destination and deciding that the cost of following that path is too high, too complicated or too injurious to me personally, I choose to stop following that path and take a new path. A change of direction.
Recently I made two changes of direction.
Decision #1 I had made plans to enter a horse show that was taking place this past weekend. I had been away at the World Equestrian Games and had not been riding. But I thought I had time to get back on track. I had been running on adrenaline at WEG; up before dawn, buzzing about at WEG during the day, editing photos and posting blog posts till late. I was on a real high with the whole thing. I drove home, a two day drive,and was still feeling pretty pumped! I was like a cartoon character with my legs going so fast they were spinning.
When you are pushing up to 70 years of age you do need to rest up a bit after that. That was reason #1 for deciding not to do the show. Reason #2….a family member has been going through some health concerns and this has been very much at the forefront of my mind. My full focus could not be on a horse show at this time.
So I decided not to go to the show. Was this quitting? I don’t think so as it was thought out and a decision was made weighing up my circumstances at the time.
Decision #2. About three years ago the FEI introduced an Adult Amateur division in the CDI (Concours Dressage International). I put the idea of competing at a CDI in the Small Tour (Prix. St. George and Intermediare 1 tests) with Biasini, on my bucket list back burner.
Last winter, my Florida coach Lou Denizard, suggested that in 2019 I could do the CDI during the winter season. That brought the idea off the back burner and onto the front burner.
Problem #1. I had to renew Biasini’s FEI passport. I started the process last week. Some 12 emails to my national federation later I found that this is complicated and expensive. The total cost of re-validating the passport and getting the membership to allow me to compete in a CDI was going to top $1000. That’s a lot if I’m not even certain I’ll do a CDI.
Problem #2 To ride a horse like Biasini, at the small tour level, I have to save my energy. I would need someone to help me with the horse care and stall cleaning etc. On top of that I stay an hour’s drive away from the show grounds. That’s no problem if I am only there for 2 1/2 days but for a CDI it would be 5 days. That is another matter.
I tallied all this up in my mind. It just did not make sense to pursue this. So I decided to make a “change of direction”. I would not stay on the CDI path and would follow my old path of doing some National shows and just showing over two days. Better for me and I think better for Biasini.
What a difficult series of decisions! I don’t think you’re quitting. You’re being very honest with yourself which can be REALLY hard to do. Wow! We never stop growing and maturing, do we? 😀
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Haha! Yes. The being honest with ourselves is not so easy but SO important. Thanka for your comment I enjoyed it.
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Excellent post and comments. I posit that given the facts you presented – even younger participants would have to re-evaluate their involvement as well. I’m stating it that way to emphasize: it’s not always a factor of ‘age’…
I’ll be 64 (on the 18th) so I’m not downplaying age-related considerations…just sayin’…
BTW: You and Biasini really rock!
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Happiest of Birthdays on the 18th! You are right it is not a factor of age really. However ten years ago I would be at the show early and doing the stall and hand walking my horse, riding my test and still at the show later in the day. Now I try to get help. Also Biasini is a horse that is a very physical ride and we are riding at a more advanced level than I was riding ten years ago. I had a friend who is 30 years younger than me tell me that at the Prix St George and Inter 1 level she felt she needed to save her energy as well. So yes, it is not age that is the impediment. I just want to be able to ride my best for both Biasini and myself. Thanks so much for taking the time to read and to leave a thoughtful comment.
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Second picture is so lovely
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To me nothing is valuable than one’s own experience. I love this blog as it always gives me some beautiful feel sometimes I expressed in comments sometimes I leave with only a like as I don’t know how to put up in words. You are very beautiful person, truly persons like you are making this earth beautiful also teaching life is beautiful. Keep writing and spread your energy ma’am.
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Thank you for this very kind comment Subbashini. I very much appreciate it. I think that I have an advantage in that I write about horses. These are such beautiful animals with such generous souls it is easy for me to spread a positive energy when writing about them. I will keep on writing you can be sure of that.
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Sounds to me like you’ve made the best decision. I was in a similar situation a couple of years ago. I’d qualified, with my horse, for a BD Veteran Horse and Veteran Rider dressage competition (here in the UK) but when I added up the costs I decided not to enter. Two tests would have cost me hundreds of pounds! I love my old horse beyond measure; schooling and hacking him give me far more pleasure than putting the two of us through the stress and strain of competition. So, enjoy your gorgeous horse and do the things which bring joy to your equestrian life together x x
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Thank you Lys for this nice comment. Biasini and I can do some national shows that are less expensive and shorter. Today we went for a glorious hack in the forest. It had rained overnight and the sun was shining . The air was fresh and the leaves are all turning golden. And there was not a single bug biting Biasini. So it was just a wonderful ride. Those are the moments! Enjoy your rides with your Veteran! All the best to both of you.
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Are you really pushing 70? I am in my early 60’s, I hope I am as impressive as you are when I’m 70. Thanks for reading my review “Age of Exodus.” It is a review that I am trying to get traffic on. I am guessing you found me through Jay. He is great.
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Yes I really enjoy Jay. He had a great sense of humor. He is also one hard working blogger and author and writer.
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Agreed.
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Sounds like a very sensible decision. Staying an hours drive away from the show ground and Biasini sounds exhausting, on top of everything else!
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It is very hard to get accommodation in Wellington during the winter show season. We stay about 50 minutes away in Palm City. So for a couple of days that’s ok but longer it’s a chore.
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It’s not quitting! And honestly it’s not changing directions since this was your original path! You’ve just come back to the best path for you!
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Well that’s a good way of looking at it!🙂
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Anne, you are amazing and an inspiration. ❤️
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Thank you Irene. I think I’m an ordinary person really but if my ideas can help anyone then I am happy.
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It’s not quitting if you’re doing the thing you love to do – but aiming for certain pinnacles and knowing it will cost more than the value returned isn’t quitting the game. It’s like a card gambler saying he’s quitting because he can’t get to the roulette game – the necessary grounding is not the same, the stakes are different.
I trained a lot of riders in basic horsemanship (long time ago now), and many, many, many were over 60, one even 87. It’s the love and trust of the partner you choose who makes the journey worthwhile. A good match is a good match.
My brother was a stockman, and he always chose the horses with attitude, trouble-makers, too smart for most people, because once he earned their trust, they’d save his life in the tough spots – as loyal and dedicated as a good dog.
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Thank you for this wonderful comment. My 70th Birthday is coming up next June. I celebrate this milestone and certainly plan on continuing to ride for as many years as I can. I love your brothers logic about horses. He is absolutely right. My horse Biasinii used to be very spooky but as we got to know each other after I bought him he trusted me and now he rarely spooks.
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A great post Anne. I always believe it is healthy to pause and re-evaluate what is important – I am sure Biasini will thank you for this too 😁💖🐎 xxx
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Thank you so much for taking the time to comment . I think Biasini would agree. Sometimes horses are much more sensible that we humans.
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Those both seem like very reasonable and smart decisions to me, ones that a fair to both you and your horse. And whoa I had no idea FEI passports were so pricey.
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Anne, are you pushing up to 70? Your pictures say otherwise. If so, I think I have just discovered another anti-aging regimen- horseriding. When is it too late to start horseriding by the way? O love this post❤ Nothing wrong with quitting. Some of us are serial quitters. It is our coping mechanism. It is our way of winning. 😍
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I will be 70 next June. I think you can start horse riding at any age. It is a bit easier if you are a kid because kids are never nervous about falling g off and sometimes adults are. But if you are comfortable around horses and have a sensible horse to ride it is never to late to start. Thanks for this comment I appreciate your support.
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I didn’t start riding until I was 50. I’m older than Leueen now. I plan to ride as long as I can because it definitely is what keeps me going. I don’t enjoy exercise for the sake of exercise, but I make sure I do whatever conditioning/strengthening it takes to keep me in shape to climb on a horse (and stay there LOL!).
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This is great news Alli. Riding is what keeps me going and keeps me maintaining my fitness. We shall keep on riding. I have a t-shirt that says: I’ll stop riding when I’m dead!
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Herrlich Beitrag .. vielen dank !!!!
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I Love this blog as I think this happens so much in our lives. I have definitly done the “I Quit” where I just could not take another day of that job or that thing I was doing that just was making me crazy, or anxious or unhappy. I do love the “Change of Direction”, so perfect to look at our decisions in a more positive way, such as your age or health or finances. I think you have made some very great decisions! I can’t believe how life changes directions for what ever reasons. You are smart to take rest when needed and do what is best for you and your horse. ❤ -Diana
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Life hands us some situations sometimes. The process of deciding what to do is not always easy. But over the years I have learned to ‘follow the signs ‘. In respect to my decision about the CDIs I began to see there were quite a few signs. Thanks so much for your comment. I appreciate it.
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I like your logic. I’ll remember what you said here. Best of luck ~ George
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Thank you I appreciate your comment.
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